14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Reflection
I’ve written plenty about love over the years and even wrote a sermon about love—true love. Much of my sermon was from that great love story, “The Princess Bride.”
Bet you thought I was going to say, “Love Story,” but that had some of the worse advice about love. Do you remember Ali McGraw saying, “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”
I was married 41 years. It lasted that long because I did say I was sorry to my wife, Nancy—many times before she died in 2017. I remember telling my kids I was sorry for many different things as well.
Westley, the hero in “Princess Bride,” had a great deal of understanding love, true love. He said to his love interest, Princess Buttercup, “Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while.”
“Princess Bride” is one of my favorite movies of all time. Especially during the wedding ceremony. But at the time Princess Buttercup was marrying the villain, not Westley.
Let me begin with the wedding, which was performed by, the “Impressive Clergyman.” That’s what they dubbed him in the credits. The “Impressive Clergyman” did a little better job in defining, “Love, true love,” than Ali McGraw did in Love Story.
Let me set the stage, as told by the clergyman. He pronounced it, or mispronounced it as, “wuv, tru wuv.”
He began the ceremony saying, “Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam… And wuv, tru wuv, will fowow you foweva…So tweasure your wuv.”
So, where do we find the definition of true love? Let’s go to the Creator of true love—the Creator of the Universe. True love is Agape Love. In marriage, it means wanting the best for the spouse—even at the expense of self. There are many ways to use love, but Agape Love is the best way.
True love means giving more than wanting. It means more than wanting or wishing for. This is a far cry from what the world tells us that true love means.
Let’s look at the most quoted Bible passage during wedding ceremonies. We even had this read at our wedding, though at the time I thought it was a Hallmark saying. I wasn’t yet a Christian.
One of my groomsmen read it. It was my roommate, the Grog. And he butchered Corinthians.
You can read it in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8: Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
“Love never ends.”
I wish Paul didn’t begin with “love is patient.” Patience and love don’t come naturally, does it? At least not true love.
The Greeks had many words we translate as love. For instance, philos, which was a brotherly love, and eros, more a sexual feeling. But true Agape Love is a willed love. It isn’t dependent on feelings, in fact, it generates them.
Which of these attributes is particularly troubling for you? How about being irritable? How many wives say, “Sometimes I wake up grumpy—and sometimes I let him sleep?” I have to will myself not to be irritable. But fortunately, we don’t have to do it alone—we can’t do it alone.
Love is a Fruit of the Spirit. Turn to Galatians 5:22: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
It begins with love because love best defines God. When we have true love, joy will follow. We don’t naturally become this way. It takes time. It takes prayer. And it takes doing.
There is so much more to say about love, true love. But let me close with Westly and the “Princess Bride.” As I already said, Westley said of true love, “Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while.” He also said, “This is true love—you think this happens every day?”
No, it doesn’t happen every day. But I believe it can. True love is a journey that takes a lifetime. It’s a journey for all married couples. There is no plan B. We can only enjoy true love by dying to ourselves as Christ died for us. And we can only do it with Him and His love. His true love.
True love is what brings us together. And keeps us together. True love never ends.
by Rick Reed
For Pondering and Prayer
Debra, my wife today, was widowed after a 40-plus year marriage. As Westly said, “This is true love—you think this happens every day?” It doesn’t. But with God, our odds are greatly increased. Always go to God and ask for true love.
Prayer: All gracious and loving God. Please smile down on us as we try to have true love—with our spouses, and all whom we come in contact with. The world will know we are Christians by our love. Amen.
